Why do I act like a child around my boyfriend

We all have roles to play in our relationships and over time they can become fixed. Good guy or bad guy, we get used to acting our part and also the way that it’s received. For this reason, change can be a difficult move to make. When one person assumes the role of child and the other adult, the strain of trying to keep things balanced will begin to wear on the partnership. If one of you is uncomfortable with the extra or lack of responsibility, it’s vital to acknowledge this early and begin to address it.

Identifying parent-child dynamics

Distinguishing parent-child dynamics from husband-wife or boyfriend-girlfriend can initially be very difficult, especially if the imbalance has grown gradually over months or years. The main clue to look out for and to be aware of is how, as a couple, you handle issues of responsibility and control.It isn’t necessarily about who makes the most money or who makes most of the decisions, it can be more subtle than this. It may be that one person is more passive or unsure of their actions or opinions, forcing the other to speak or act on their behalf. It could also be that one party is slower at tasks than the other, so over time has become resigned to always having things taken out of their hands. What began as a quest for efficiency from the adult partner actually becomes one of control, when the child partner was not perceived as quick or good enough. Once something like this happens, it’s quite clear that a shift has occurred.

Finding the cause

A good place to begin, if this is not the sort of relationship you’re happy with, is to find out the cause of your partner taking on the role of child. Firstly, work out if it’s true of all situations, in and outside of your relationship, or confined to specific ones. Does the behaviour centre around a particular subject, such as refusing to help with housework, manage finances or emotional challenges?One important question to ask yourself is whether the situation was ever any different, or if actually it has always presented in this way. Are you trying to change something that in hindsight has never been any different?

Are you both unhappy with your roles?

Different people are happy playing different roles in life and some are content with the adult-child dynamic because it serves their needs. It’s possible for both men and women to want to be looked after, nurtured and have very little responsibility in their lives. For it to work out however, you as their partner need to be comfortable with this and accept it as the role you’re playing. You have a choice to stay or leave, and if discussions or compromises are not working, then you must make the choice and live with it.

If you’re the adult

If this is a role you don’t want to take on, then it’s important to communicate to your partner why it’s a problem and what you feel must be done to address it. Sometimes, the fault cannot be placed entirely on the other person. When there is conflict, never assume that you as the acting adult are automatically in the right. Think about whether you’re someone who has control issues, is a perfectionist, or who finds it difficult to be flexible or open to another person’s behaviour or thinking.Identify what needs to change in your role, in order to help either shift the dynamics completely, or make their unsustainability even more apparent to you both. It may be something as simple as refraining from clearing up after your partner. Children, even big ones, tend to notice when the adult or caregiver in their relationship suddenly goes missing or stops doing their usual tasks. If your words aren’t being heard, the best bet is to stop the behaviour you’re uncomfortable with and if this goes unnoticed, reassess your overall compatibility.

If you’re the child

If you are an adult, either content or simply accepting of your role as child in a relationship, the first thing you need to ask yourself is why? If you’re told often by your partner that your behaviour is childish, then it’s time to question yourself honestly about whether you think this is true.Take it from us, parenting an adult-child in a relationship can be utterly exhausting and is the fast train to losing respect for someone. The best thing you can do is look at what’s expected of you and work out why you’re not delivering it. Are the requests too much for you, is there self-work you need to do, or is it an issue of simply not being accepted for who you are and the way you do things? Step up as an adult, investigate it and come up with your own opinion. Then decide on your own course of action.For more information on how Berkeley Internationals independent matchmaking services can be of use to you visit our how we work page. Or fill in our discrete enquiry form here.

“In psychoanalytic theory, individuals revert their behavior to an earlier stage of development, and they may mimic childish mannerisms as well as speech. It is actually very common and most couples resort to it when they want to either display vulnerability or as a way to get closer in a very intimate manner.”

View complete answer on elitedaily.com

Why do I talk like a baby around my boyfriend?

Baby talk isn't just a way to create intimacy in a relationship — it actually means your relationship is healthy. “Baby talk or private couple's speak is really about nurturing your partner and strengthening the bond between you both,” behavioral scientist Clarissa Silva tells Elite Daily.

View complete answer on elitedaily.com

Do guys like Babytalks?

Additionally, adults cite the motivations to be playful, affectionate, and vulnerable as the reasons for their baby talk. Baby talk, then, may draw out loving feelings from our partners even when we've far outgrown our cute phases. 4. Baby talking makes men seem more loyal.

View complete answer on psychologytoday.com

What does being babied in a relationship mean?

to treat (someone) like a baby; pamper or overprotect.

View complete answer on collinsdictionary.com

Why do couples use baby talk?

It's the exaggerated pitch, tempo and intonation that parents use when talking to their little ones – what linguists call “motherese” or “parentese.” According to speech and hearing expert Patricia Kuhl, this special style of speaking facilitates social interactions with babies, helping them learn how to communicate.

View complete answer on scientificamerican.com

Why We Should Be ‘Babyish’ in Love

How do ladies behave when they are in love?

A woman who is in love with you will take an interest in your life. She wants to know about your day, about your past, about your hopes and dreams. She isn't just asking to be polite, either. She is genuinely interested in your life and what you think and feel, and all of your opinions on things.

View complete answer on powerofpositivity.com

Why does my partner treat me like a child?

When a person treats their partner like a child, it's often because the partner has demonstrated that they are okay with that treatment. They may not have a strong sense of self, appropriate boundaries, or feel safe conflicting with the other person.

View complete answer on aconsciousrethink.com

Why do I act like a baby?

The reason you can act like a child is that it is your default response to stress and anxiety. You can just get used to acting like a child in a bid to quell anxiety and tension, but this also has the effect of quelling others' expectations of you – whilst also holding you back from being the real you.

View complete answer on therapyin.london

Why do guys like to be babied?

Guys love to be babied in relationships, because that way, they feel they have your sole attention. They want to be the center of your world and that's adorable because it means they always want to be on your mind.

View complete answer on hernorm.com

How do I stop being a mom and my boyfriend?

How to stop parenting your partner

  1. Acknowledge your part in it. Parent-child scenarios o ften begin when one partner feels the other isn't sharing the load, or when the same issues keep resurfacing. ...
  2. Be direct, not passive aggressive. ...
  3. Talk it out (even better, make it a joke) ...
  4. Divide and conquer as a team.

View complete answer on chatelaine.com

What do guys like being called the most?

Babe. If the guy you're speaking to is your romantic partner, then he would appreciate you calling them babe or baby. It's a lovely term that softens the relationship and makes one another sweet. Babe or baby is a romantic term that some couples use for each other.

View complete answer on thecoldwire.com

Why does my voice get higher when im with my boyfriend?

In fact, it's a common phenomenon for someone to change pitch of their voice when talking to someone they're romantically interested in, and it's all because they want to make that love connection, a study says.

View complete answer on medicaldaily.com

Why does my voice get higher when I talk to my BF?

It's an evolutionary response for men to calmly raise their vocal pitch when speaking to a member of the opposite sex, he says. It conveys tenderness, trustworthiness, and lack of aggression. (And you do the same thing around kids, he adds.)

View complete answer on menshealth.com

How can you tell if a man is immature?

Here is a list of the toxic traits of an immature guy;

  1. He wants to control you;
  2. He doesn't reciprocate: Takes and does not give back (emotionally, sexually, financially);
  3. He is self-centered most of the time;
  4. Leaves without an explanation. ...
  5. He does not apologize or acknowledge his wrongdoings.

View complete answer on hetexted.com

What boys want from their girlfriend physically?

To be loved for who they really are

Even if they won't admit it, a guy will groom himself to impress his sweetheart. He will even change the things she doesn't like about him. But he also wants to seen for who he really is, and be loved for that.

View complete answer on scoopwhoop.com

Why does a man call a girl babe?

To put it simply, when you call someone babe, it probably means that you have feelings for them. "Its use in any form means that you are attracted and proud to be with your partner," Maria says.

View complete answer on seventeen.com

What do guys need in a relationship?

Men Need Praise

Affirmation and specific praise from a lover gives guys a sense of security and confidence in their relationship as well as outside of it. Hearing a simple "thank you" on a regular basis for small acts can go a long way in making a man feel good about himself and your relationship.

View complete answer on dating.lovetoknow.com

What mental disorder makes you act like a child?

Summary: The 'Peter Pan Syndrome' affects people who do not want or feel unable to grow up, people with the body of an adult but the mind of a child. The syndrome is not currently considered a psychopathology.

View complete answer on sciencedaily.com

What is a childlike personality?

(tʃaɪldlaɪk ) adjective. You describe someone as childlike when they seem like a child in their character, appearance, or behavior. His most enduring quality is his childlike innocence. Synonyms: innocent, trusting, simple, naive More Synonyms of childlike.

View complete answer on collinsdictionary.com

What it called when someone treats you like a child?

infantilize. verb. to treat someone like a child.

View complete answer on macmillandictionary.com

How do I stop treating my partner like a child?

How to Stop Parenting Your Partner

  1. Accept that your mate does not like being treated like a kid.
  2. Be mindful of your actions and stop treating your mate as a child.
  3. Create a calendar for your family but be clear that keeping it current is everyone's responsibility.

View complete answer on verywellmind.com

What is mothering a man?

Other behaviors of mothering a grown man include acting overly helpful by doing things for him that he can do for himself; assuming a man will be absent-minded or forgetful and therefore reminding him of information that he should remember by himself; taking charge of activities that you assume he can't do right; ...

View complete answer on vaildaily.com

What are the signs of real love?

You can usually recognize real love by these 12 signs.

  • You feel safe with them. ...
  • They listen. ...
  • They acknowledge your differences instead of trying to change you. ...
  • You can communicate easily. ...
  • They encourage you to do your own thing. ...
  • You trust each other. ...
  • They make an effort. ...
  • You know you can collaborate or compromise.

View complete answer on healthline.com

How do you know if its fake love?

These are 5 top signs of fake love in a relationship

  1. They're emotionally distant. In a relationship, fakers have a tendency to be non-communicative. ...
  2. Always willing to throw in the towel. Conflict happens in every relationship. ...
  3. They don't meet you halfway. Are you always the one to plan things? ...
  4. Unconcern. ...
  5. That gut feeling.

View complete answer on pulse.ng