What is a stem girl lgbtq+

According to Urban Dictionary, the word stem is simply a combination of two expression categories associated with Black and Latinx gay women and non-binary persons in the LGBT community. The word stud refers to a butch Black or Latinx woman, and femme refers to the opposite of a stud basically meaning a feminine lesbian or non-binary person. 

The actual word stem is exclusive to the Black and Latinx LGBTQ community. Remember it is wrong for the Caucasian community to use the word stem in their daily life. The more appropriate label for white people whose expression and gender identity may be similar to a stem is soft butch or futch which is a combination of butch and femme. Basically, the term stem is a racially-specific version of futch or soft butch.

A stem lesbian or soft butch will have the stereotypical stud characteristics and some femme style without basically fitting the ideas associated with being a stud or femme. They have masculine traits but can also have feminine characteristics. Stem girls can wear dresses, have long hair, and care immensely about their appearance as well as the type of makeup to put on.

Stem women can be hard and soft, have a style that is both feminine and masculine, care greatly about their appearance. Some prefer to express themselves in others in physical appearance. Basically their gender expression revolves around combining both masculine and feminine characteristics. 

Stems may also sexually express themselves in a more feminine way. They may even prefer to play a passive role in relationships.

History

The term stud dates back to the 1960s. It was and continues to be a synonym used by the Black and Latinx lesbian community for the word butch. Butch refers to a masculine person. So, stud also refers to a lesbian with masculine personality, style, and appearance. 

The opposite of butch and stud is the word femme. It means that a person is feminine in energy, style, expression. 

A stem is the combination of these terms. It is somewhere in between stud and femme bringing the perfect mix of masculine and feminine.

Recently, a complicated issue arose on social media with Caucasian gay women claiming the use of stud and stem tags. These or a combination of these categories should not be used by white women.

Differences

A stem person will typically care greatly about their appearance. They tend to look like a star when leaving the house. A stem person who is often well-groomed, enjoys sports, wears comfortable yet sexy clothing can even be described as a tomboy. 

Stud

A stud refers to a masculine Black or Latinx lesbian. Studs typically have strong male energy, wear manly clothing and present themselves in a masculine manner. They tend to only date feminine girls. This word is the opposite of femme.

Futch

This is essentially a Caucasian synonym for a stem. The word futch is a combination of femme and butch which is also what the word stem is when you add stud and femme. A futch person will exhibit both feminine and male traits.

Chapstick lesbian

Some stem women also identify as chapstick lesbians. They have similar typically male and feminine mannerisms. Chapstick lesbians often have more of a hard personality, do not wear dresses and tend to have short hair whereas stem lesbians can rock long tresses, sometimes dress in a more feminine way, play with ideas of masculinity and femininity. 

Pronouns

Stems are generally women who love women. They tend to use she/her pronouns in communication and most often identify as women. 

That said, stem includes a variety of gender identities on the spectrum. A transgender or gender-fluid person, as well as non-binary people, can express themselves as a stem. Their pronouns may be they/them or other neutral pronouns.

It is important to add and share your pronouns first. Always ask the person about the pronouns they prefer using and never assume someone’s gender based on their gender expression. 

Flag and Symbols

There is no official stem flag but there is an inclusive futch flag called the horizon flag. It is an all-inclusive flag for futch people including people of color. 

The colors represent the inclusion of all futches. Purple stands for the people of color, people with disabilities, body positivity, and all other futches. Blue stands for the butch and femme history. Green shows support for femmes and the wider lesbian community. Yellow is for inclusivity and tolerance. Orange represents autonomy and independence. Red represents futch history and culture. Red-pink represents LGBTQ+ history.

There is also a butch femme symbol that may be used by some stem lesbians. It was created in 2014 by a group of non-binary Brazilians and continues to be widely used in the community among butches and femmes. 

Am I a Stem Lesbian?

Basically, if you are a Black or Latinx person who likes to dress in a typically masculine way but has feminine traits you may identify as a stem. If you find yourself somewhere in between stud and femme If the label feels right and fits you well then it may be the right term for you. 

How to Support Stem Lesbians?

Showing your support for the lesbian community can go a long way in terms of LGBTQ+ rights. Stop and think about what you can add in terms of the fight for equality and the rights of the LGBT community. Here are a few ideas on how you can help pledge your support for the LGBT community and QTPOC in particular.

• Find your local queer resource center or organizations helping QTPOC and LGBT community as a whole.
• Learn about the politics and complex issues QTPOC youth face today
• Show your support by seeking out QTPOC-owned business
• It may be hard, but show that you care at work, school, community centers
• Watch the type of language you use to refer to individuals of all sexualities and identities on the spectrum
• Care about the issues you represent, volunteer at LGBTQ+ events
• Add your voice of support and awareness during pride month
• Take time to educate yourself and others on QTPOC issues

The LGBTQ community is having more and more terms and definitions. We constantly see new terminologies being added to the list, like “stem”.

Many people think that this concept has something to do with the part of a plant, but what is a stem in the LGBT world? We explain it to you in today’s article!

What Is a ‘Stem Girl’

A “Stem Girl” is a person who, speaking of gender, expresses himself as a stud and a woman. According to the Urban Dictionary, she defines herself as a lesbian who appears as a stud, since she wears men’s clothing.

However, she can wear makeup and have long hair. She still has a lot of feminine sides, but also masculine.

What are a Stud and Femme?

Since we are talking about masculinity in lesbians, we also want to explain the concept of “Stud”.

A “Stud” in the LGBT community, is a very masculine lesbian who dresses like a man. On the contrary, a Femme is a lesbian who dresses more feminine and is feminine.

So you to understand the concept of Stem, it’s a mixture of stud and femme.

“Stem Famous”

Some famous people consider themselves Stem. An example is Amber Closet. More than once, on her YouTube channel, she talks about being a stem and how she feels about that.

Another star is Katherine Moennig, well known for L-Word who plays Shane McCutcheon.

“Stem” is a combination of “stud” meaning a butch person who is Black or Latinx, and “femme,” meaning a more feminine-leaning lesbian or queen woman/non-binary person. It’s basically a racially-specific version of “futch” (a combo of “femme” and “butch”). 

A “stem lesbian” is a Black or Latinx queer person who is both a “stud” and “femme.” The best of both worlds! 

What is the history of “stem”?

“Stud” is a term that dates back to the 1960s and is used as a synonym for “butch” in the Black and Latinx communities. “Butch” typically means a more masculine-leaning person in style and energy. The opposite of “butch” is “femme,” or a more feminine-leaning person in style and energy. See also: high femme, an uber-feminine self-care junkie, and lipstick lesbian, an uber-feminine self-care junkie who loves lipstick. 

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Basically…

“Stem” is the perfect combination of these two ideas: masculine but feminine, hard but soft, hot but still hot. A “stem” falls somewhere on the “stud” and “femme” spectrum, similar to a soft butch. They are the cousins of chapstick lesbians. Low maintenance but well groomed. Always looks perfect but somehow effortlessly. They are confident but also coy. Basically, they are powerful A.F. 

Chapstick Lesbian Meaning »

Robyn Exton

Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER the world's largest brand for LGBTQ womxn & queer people. Also runs London Queer Fashion Show. Find her on LinkedIn or Twitter.