How to deal with jealousy between cats

Does your dog quickly get between you and another pup when you start to show the other animal attention? Maybe your dog sprawls across your partner's side of the bed, or your cat meows disapprovingly when you hug your friend. Sometimes, this jealous behavior can turn aggressive, but what's the best way to deal with it?

Dogs and cats might not feel jealousy the same as humans, but they certainly compete with others for your attention. Jealous and aggressive behavior in cats and dogs can manifest in various ways, from urinating in the house to excessive growling to being extra clingy. You can reduce undesirable behaviors by giving your pets equal attention, providing them with individual spaces, and staying aware of potential triggers.

The best way to reduce and stop jealous and aggressive behavior in your pets is to understand the signs and why they happen. Pinpointing what sets your pet off can help you better understand how to stop their unpleasant behavior.

6 Signs of Jealous Behavior in Dogs and Cats

Dogs and cats can undoubtedly desire all of your attention. Does your furry friend start acting weird when you show any of that attention to another animal or person? If so, they could be jealous, or the animal equivalent—competing for the most affection.

Here are a few signs that could mean your pet is jealous:

1. Aggressive behavior toward the animal or person getting the attention. Your pet might nibble or try to snip them, or when it comes to another pet, start a fight. When a visitor arrives, does your pet start acting up? Your pet might even show some aggressive behavior (barking or growling) in hopes they’ll scare the competition away.
2. Going potty in the house or not using their litter box. (After you’ve ruled out any other possibilities or health concerns.) 
3. Your pet tries to get between you and the other animal or person. They might even attempt to push them away.
4. Your cat or dog seems extra clingy, following you everywhere and licking you. They try to stop you if you try to do anything that doesn’t involve them. For example, does your cat sprawl across your book as you try to read?
5. Does your pet start trying to show off? If your pal starts doing tricks for you, they're likely vying for your attention.
6. Sometimes, when your pet is jealous, they might leave the room. To overlay a human emotion or action on it—it would be like a pouty toddler walking out of the room. Or, an upset person giving someone else the silent treatment.

10 Signs of Aggression in Dogs and Cats

If you’re worried your dog or cat is acting aggressively, there are a few key things to pay attention to. Sometimes, dogs and cats might attempt to scare off someone they see as competition with a growl or bark. But, in actuality, wouldn’t take it any further. 

Other times, your pet might want your full attention so much that they act out on their aggressive and jealous behavior. Pets can experience aggression for a variety of reasons, from fear to pain to jealousy. What you see as jealous aggression is likely related to dominance or territorial aggression. Your pet doesn’t want anyone else in their space or getting more attention than them.

Here are signs of aggression in cats and dogs:

1. Restlessness
2. A stiff posture
3. Showing the whites of their eyes (called “whale eye”)
4. Licking their lips
5. Growling/hissing
6. Lunging
7. Biting
8. Scratching/swatting with paws
9. Your dog might avoid looking at you. Your cat might stare directly at you.
10. Your cat may roll on their side to expose all of their claws and teeth.

Remember, when it comes to aggression, it can be for different reasons. Therefore, make sure to pay attention to what seems to trigger the behavior. Also, discuss any sudden behavioral changes with your vet. It could be a sign of an underlying health issue that is causing your pet discomfort.

What Causes Jealousy and Aggression in Pets?

Many things can spark jealous or aggressive behavior in pets. For example, in a multi-cat household, jealousy or aggression can stem from a lack of resources. Not having enough litter boxes or scratching posts to go around can make some cats testy and competitive.

If you have a cat and a dog living together or multiple pups, it could be that you’re unknowingly giving one pet more attention than the other. For some breeds, these behaviors might be more apparent than others, with genetics playing a large role.

It could also be that your pet is anxious, doesn’t get enough exercise or proper stimulation, or is bored. For aggression, pain can sometimes be the culprit, or your pet could be territorial and over-protective of their food. 

Your pets might also show jealous or aggressive behavior because they don't have enough personal space. (Something a lot of humans can probably relate to.)

The Best Way to Stop Your Pet's Jealous Behavior

The best thing to do to thwart jealous behavior is to ignore bad behavior or move to another space if your pet keeps interfering. 

• If you have multiple pets, give each animal their own food dish, water dish, litter box, bed, etc. 
• In situations where your pet might get nervous or tense, provide them with a positive distraction. An interactive treat puzzle or a lick mat is a great way to keep them busy and help them stay calm.
• Try to keep track of the behaviors and triggers in case you need to call in a behavioral specialist. The more info you can provide, the better.
• Avoid giving one pet more attention than the other.
• Make sure to reward your pet’s good behavior.
• Never purposely give one pet (or person) more attention to make your pet jealous (even if you’re just playing). Your pet doesn’t know that you’re just messing around.

The Best Way to Stop Your Pet's Aggressive Behavior

It’s important to know why your dog or cat is acting aggressively. When you can identify the triggers, you can try to avoid those situations while working on the problem. It's also important to recognize your pet’s cues so you can hopefully prevent an aggressive attack before it happens.

It can be helpful to keep a journal to track this information about your pet. You can use it to look for patterns and also give a clearer picture to your vet if and when you seek professional help.

Early intervention and early socialization are always the best way to try and prevent aggressive behavior. But if your pup or cat is starting to act aggressively toward others, you might need to seek the help of your vet. 

Your vet might also recommend working with a behavioral specialist to pinpoint the exact root of your pet’s aggression. Together, you can make a plan with a professional to help your cat or dog be happier and healthier.

For more helpful resources, check out the rest of our blog. Our goal is to give you a front-row seat to all the information you need to be a fantastic pet parent.

If you’ve ever owned more than one cat at a time, then you are probably well aware of cat jealousy. Cats can become jealous for a number of reasons. But I’d have to say in my experiences, cats becoming jealous of other cats might top the list. As cat owners, seeing our cats get along with one another is high on our list of priorities. And it can be deeply upsetting to us if our cats can’t seem to make things work. Is your cat the jealous type? Find out what causes this cat behavior and follow my suggestions to build a long-lasting friendship between your two cats.

First off, why do cats become jealous?

Similar to us, cats can quickly show their jealousy should they feel as if they are being shunned from a situation or an environment. For example, think about when you close the door on your feline friend. She might quickly grow insane with jealousy and yowl, paw under the door, etc.

For your cat, they are a micromanager by nature. It’s in their DNA to want to know what is going on and when it’s going on—at all times. If they feel shut out, they might be quick to express themselves by way of aggression or fear. And just think of how jealous people act out of fear. They react to cope with what’s troubling them. Cats are the same in this way.

Additionally, cats can quickly show jealousy should you start paying attention to something or someone else more than them. People often wonder: why does my cat sit on my computer keyboard? Well, the answer to that is simple! They’re jealous! This desperate “pay attention to me!” cry for help should be a clear indication to you as their owner that they want your attention, and they want it right meow.

And when it comes to you paying attention to another cat over them, this can quickly plant a seed of jealousy that can grow roots quickly should you not be proactive about it. Your cat might even show their jealousy to this other cat by lashing out at them—or even you.

Interesting fact on cat jealousy: If your cat was poorly socialized as a kitten, this could lead to a cat that easily becomes codependent on you and displays signs of jealousy often.

How do cats show jealousy?

There are several signs of jealousy in cats. Some of the most common signs of feline jealousy include:

• Swatting
• Hissing
• Growling
• Biting
• Unprovoked attacks, particularly to the person or thing that triggers their newfound jealousy
• Hiding
• Going outside of the litter box
• New destructive behavior, such as shredding curtains, ripping furniture, etc.

If you’ve brought a new member into your home, do your part to reassure your existing cat that has grown jealous that you still value them and love them dearly. Your cat needs reassurance, despite the fact that they might give you the cold shoulder from time to time. Deep down, we all need love. And that includes your cat, too! Don’t let that tough exterior fool you, and find ways to remind them just how special they are to you to keep their growing jealousy at bay.

How to help your cat with their jealousy…

If you’ve defined your cat’s jealousy, the best thing you can do as their owner is to alleviate it. Your cat doesn’t become jealous for no reason, so do your best to pinpoint the issue so that you can have your happy cat back once again. And if you know it is your other cat that’s causing them to be jealous, then that’s the first step to resolving the issue.

Offer your troubled kitty a space that is their own, and make this a haven of happiness for them. Cats are not fans of change and should they incur it, they prefer things that are on their terms. So, if this is a new cat that’s causing them to become jealous, remember that time is always the best medicine. Do not press the situation as this will only prove to make things worse. Instead, make the environment in which your cat is living a positive environment that they will enjoy—especially the area of your home which is “theirs” in their mind.

Offer them mental stimulation, enrichment toys, play, and lots of love to your confused kitty. Your cat is simply insecure and they need you to bring them back to the center and remind them that they are wanted, loved, and appreciated. Be sure that they have a space that is theirs and theirs alone where they can decompress and feel at ease. And remember, above all, patience is key.

Did you learn anything new and interesting about our feline friends? Share this article with other cat owners that you know so that they can learn something, too.

Have you ever wondered why cats often don’t make eye contact with other cats? Find out the answer here on cattitudedaily.com.